So my lovelies, I'm only writing a flippin' E-book!
It's going to be packed full of funny anecdotes, how to Yoga advice and most importantly, actionable steps that we can take to ACTIVATE our RADIANCE!
So what does this mean? Its all well and good to say ACTIVATE your RADIANCE, but what the heck does that actually entail? Am I going to suddenly illuminate like some trumped up christmas decoration or what?
Ok, Ok ... I guess I should do a little explaining ...
When I say ACTIVATE your RADIANCE, what I mean is ... being unapologetically yourself. This means freedom, my furry followers.
I want a show of hands ... how many of us actually speak to ourselves in a kind and loving way on a daily basis? How many of us allow ourselves the 'bad' emotions such as anger, frustration, sadness or jealousy without judgement? How many of us can be ecstatically happy or joyful and simply allow it to ourselves without feeling like we are wrong or bad for enjoying ourselves? How many of us are able to look at ourselves in the mirror and be completely at peace with and even love what we see? How many of us allow ourselves mistakes and missteps without beating ourselves up or rifling through the offending memory again and again wondering how we could have done better, been better or spoken better? How many of us don't actually worry about what others think of us?
Put your hand up if you do all of these things, everyday ... go on ... if you have your hand up now then you are one of the very lucky few who have already stepped into your incredible radiance and there is nothing more for you here ... plus you are making the rest of us look bad, soooo ... off you pop ...
Right, now we've established that pretty much all of us are at some point in our lives, pretty mean to ourselves ... some of us have been being mean to ourselves constantly for years, even since we were children. Some of us are so ingrained in the habitual assassination of our characters that we don't even realise we are being mean anymore. We have been in a toxic relationship with ourselves for so long that we actually accept and believe all the mean shit that we say about ourselves now. We are the classic beaten partner who makes excuses for terrible treatment by blaming ourselves.
Over Christmas I went back to the U.K to spend some time with my family.
One night I was sitting and talking to my Nan, who is 91 years old ... now for a 91 year old lady, she is incredibly fit ... she can still go up and down the stairs by herself, she can still drive and walk short distances, she cooks for herself, does all the washing and ironing and goes out alone on her buggy. She has some physical deterioration, sure ... and she has some health issues that cause her pain, but in spite of that, she still manages a great deal!
Whilst we were talking she started to say how vulnerable she felt now that she was much older and how that made her feel so weak and stupid ...
As she spoke, I saw that she was viewing her vulnerability and herself in a quite a negative manner and I tried to help in the only way I knew how ... with a story!
'Imagine for a moment', I ventured 'that you have a best friend ... this friend has been with you throughout your entire life ... they have stayed with you though illness, health, bad times, good times, money, poverty and all other events that happen over the course of a life time ... this friend is always there no matter what is going on ... they have never left you and their love for you has always been unwavering ...
Now imagine that you have been speaking to your friend the same way that you speak to yourself for all those years ... what do you think this friend would think of you now? Do you think they would still be your friend? Would they still love you? Would they still want to support you?'
'Hmm' She said, 'No I suppose not'
'So why not try to see yourself like an old friend who has never left your side and never will? Try to speak a little bit more kindly to your friend-self and show her a bit of love!'
She said she would try and we had a hug ... it was a beautiful moment with my Nan and one that I will never forget.
But it also showed me how ingrained our negative self talk can be ... when a person can get to 91 and still be speaking to themselves harshly in a loveless, aggressive voice ... how can this be helpful? I'll tell you something ... it isn't!
What I'm going to be putting into my E-book will be ways in which we can begin to quiet this voice of self-hatred ... now some people may think that the word 'self-hatred' is a little strong but I truly believe that when we speak to ourselves negatively for so many years, we are cultivating seeds of hatred for ourselves ... how can we be so unkind for so long without feeling hatred towards the perpetrator of this unkindness?
I will be unveiling actionable steps that we can start taking today that help to quiet the negative self talk, learning how to accept and even love all facets of our selves ... even the dark sides!
Using my own extensive experience with negative self talk which ranged from a dull sort of throbbing self loathing through to blistering hatred that erupted in moments of pure physical violence towards myself, I will show how I came to a place of acceptance and freedom from self-violence and how I'm moving onwards towards self love.
I still have a way to go but I'm getting there and, in my book, I will be sharing my journey, with all its ups and downs and sideways motions!
If you feel that this could be something worth reading for yourself or sharing with a friend who may benefit then simply keep your eyes peeled for more updates from me! I'll be posting more details as the book progresses!
Much love from me to you,